Autumn Equinox; the let go season. Time to care for our Lungs: Breath, Boundaries.
We are transitioning into Autumn now and in Chinese medicine, it’s the lung season, so lets give our a bit of extra care and attention. The lungs are of course about our breath, the oxygen without which we cannot live, but they are also connected with the emotion of grief. Breathing in is nurturing, nourishing and expansive, breathing out is just as necessary! Breathing out is releasing, relaxing and let go.
The pressure to carry it all, decisions, expectations, emotional load, can lead to shallow breathing, both literally and metaphorically. We hold everything in, forgetting that release is as vital as retention.
The Power of the Breath - Conscious Breathwork
Breathing is our most fundamental rhythm, and yet most of us do it totally unconsciously and somewhat superficially. The breath mirrors our state and how we interract with life. Can we notice if our breath is too fast, too high in our lungs, too tight? Conscious breathwork is a wonderful practice which invites us to pause, to make space within ourselves, to return to presence.
And the best thing of all about it is that it is totally doable right now, at any given moment, anywhere! No fancy equipment and it’s totally free!
Simple practices like belly breathing, heart coherence breathing, or just a few intentional deep sighs can really help calm the nervous system and restore focus. Conscious breathing recentres us, allowing us to catch that reactive energy and giving us that all important moment to choose our response. It is the simplest and most powerful form of self-regulation available to us.
Try: Before your next meeting/call/stressful event, take three slow breaths. Breathe in through the nose, out through the mouth. Feel your chest rise, your lungs expand, then release. You can let your shoulders rise as you breathe in and then drop on the exhale. Notice how you feel when you do this.
There are many, many schools of conscious breathing and I invite you to see which one works for you. But you really don’t need a school or a teacher other than your own body. What happens when you focus on your breath even for just 2 minutes or as you read this article! It is such a crucial and fundamental part of an embodied approach to Leadership.
If you like a specific exercise, try the Heart Coherence Breath from Heartmath (a wonderful research centre). Place your hand on your heart and use your intention and imagination to breathe into your heart. This activates the ‘heartbrain’ the neurons which are in your heart (discovered by Dr J Armour in 1991).
Breath and Boundaries
In the Chinese medicine system the emotion is grief and the function of the lungs is “Boundaries”. I wont go far into the enormous wealth of knowledge that is Chinese Medicine, but I have used if for over 30 years and it is amazing! Lets just take it as a reminder to revisit our Boundaries - and who doesn’t need that!
Boundaries are a constant art form for me. Where do I need to take in the other person, the world, the information and when do I say, “No, not for me”. This is also a particular issue for many of the women leaders I work with. We can often have strong and finely tuned empathy but can have issues around understanding how uncomfortable it can feel to hold our own boundaries around what we will and wont do or accept. When we say yes too often, we can actually absorb others’ emotions. Then we can feel overwhelmed more easily and it is harder to look after our own needs. We can end up giving too much and feeling depleted. Then ironically, it can become increasingly difficult to say no and we can get ourselves into a vicious cycle. Strong boundaries don’t separate us; they oxygenate us.
Have your heard the phrase: “There is no such thing as bad weather, only inappropriate clothing?” (Alan Wainwright and Billy Connolly). Imagine your boundaries as clothes. If you go out in winter, dressed for the summer, you certainly are not going to be protected from the elements. However, think about if you wore a cashmere vest or a merino wool under garment. Soft, warm, breathable. Boundaries are like that: they are protective, supportive, flexible, protecting you and your energy, whilst allowing you to be connected to nature.